Mobilize Irritation//Queues

“…An irritation against doing something pointless…[symptoms] can be momentarily relieved by clicking on a link, casting an eye on some porn, twitching on some game, making a status update. (67).”

 

I like to think that I’m a pretty nice, and non-violent person. I’ve never been in a fight–though often fantasized about it–and I don’t really get mad at others too frequently. The most mad I’ll ever get is at myself in the frequent case that I make a stupid mistake. Forgetting my keys, leaving a jacket somewhere, etc. I’ve gotten better in recent years, but occasionally there will be this perfect storm of self-anger, where I became irate with myself for an inability to do something, as was the case a few Tuesdays ago.

It’s the last week of October, and I’m poised to go to Washington DC for Halloweekend with some friends from high school. The day before I go however, I have two projects and a paper due, which means that the previous weekend–by which I mean Tuesday night–was hell. It shouldn’t have been–I cleared out my schedule and cancelled all obligations, making sure that I had plenty of time to get all my work done.

I hate when I procrastinate, and the problem is that it always sneaks up on me under the guise of work. I’ll try to reward myself with five minutes of time on Facebook, only to find an video that relates to the religion paper I’m writing. I click on it, and realize that I know next to nothing about the way drugs are viewed in various religious lenses. Now I am deep into the history of drug usage of church officials and I’m reading articles by scholars and heretics alike.  At some level, I think I must realize that I’m wasting time. But I always convince myself that I’m doing this for work, and soon I’ll procrastinate through articles for a few hours. 

the ability to adapt, even if only in minor increments to a positive or negative stimulus is one means of identifying what lives and what doesn’t”66

 

The clock is ticking, it’s now Wednesday morning as I try to finish up the last of my projects. But I am also trying to see how well I remember the lyrics to ‘Hey Ya!’. These posts interest me but are slowly killing me and ruining my time. I still haven’t started editing my audio cuts, and I’m not even sure if I have quality clips.

The ensuing panic is complemented by anger at myself, for wasting so much time when I knew that I could’ve done better. I fed my irritation, and slowly fell into the world of internet articles. My insatiable curiosity had gotten the best of me, and I had once again fallen behind. It’s moments like this though, where I question the format of the internet, and the queue of articles that kept building in my mind. Why did I feel the need to keep clicking? And looking at my history, there was no rhyme or reason to the pages I viewed in the past 45 minutes. Is there anyway to control my viewing..yknow, other than self control? It’s interesting that the internet doesn’t really need apparent queue formation.

Consider a ‘Choose Your Own Adventure Novel’, in which after each brief page you are prompted to make a decision and turn to another part of the book, where you will most likely meet your untimely death, until you decide to just cheat and go to the page where you’ll escape. Within a book like that, your decisions are made for you. In all books, there is a queue, normally from chapter one until the end in a linear que. CYOA switch up this formula through placing choices throughout the book. The internet, has no structure whatsoever. You can read through articles chronologically, but I’ll just follow my interests and see what the vast database of knowledge online can present for me.

This is why I was initially hesitant to allow full navigation on my ecology. Selfish? Certainly. But a strict , linear navigation that only allows viewers to return home upon completion requires a different type of interaction with the webpage; instead of leaving the viewer free to explore the page, it forces them into a certain framework of reading the website. Websites and the internet are predicated on the notion of freedom to explore that does away with the queue system. Yet, I always feel like this brings out the worst in my mind.

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~ by calvinthelord on November 18, 2014.

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